Destroy All Evidence

Because sometimes you're 23 and you need to start carving out a place for yourself in the world, and because tumblr can be a nice distraction from how truly terrifying a task that can be.

(I'm Nicole, by the way. You can email me at destroyallevidence@gmail.com)

Ever since my mom got XM Radio, she’s been saying stuff like this:

Mom: Have you heard that new Adele* song?

Me: What? Who?

Mom: You know - Adele. Adele! She does that one song with Kanye.

Me: Are you talking about Kanye West?

Mom: Yeah, the Golddigger guy! I love that song!

My mom is a 49-year-old white woman. She’s the CFO of a hospital. She’s never driven a minivan, but she does own a knitted Christmas sweater with a snowman on it. And she digs Kanye, apparenty.

She is my idea of perfection.

(via dlisted)

September 21

bunkercomplex:

Wedding day has arrived.

Danny, run. Run like the wind. Victory fist pumps and Heineken will be had all around if you do. If you don’t, then just Heineken.

That’s right, Danny. Just the Heineken - FOREVER.

“ Boy, I’m gonna drop kick you through the field goal posts of life. My dad, to my brother. Their relationship is so special.

The Big Lebowski > Burn After Reading > Intolerable Cruelty

Eh. I do love me some John Malkovich (who doesn’t?), but still - eh.

(via Post Secret)

September 16

“ You need to stop getting wound up about such losers, seriously. I don’t think you realize you’re like light years ahead of these mofos! Get on board, yo.

Nicole giving me kickass advice about a dude I was into (via bunkercomplex)

Kickass advice for a kickass gal. And seriously, lay off the weirdos! Stop lusting after Bens when you so clearly deserve Noels.

September 14

(via Adama For President)

September 2

Destroy All Evidence

*Estelle